Saturday, December 31, 2011

Playing Together

Compromise: A brother and his little sister playing Finn McMissile Dollhouse.

Friday, December 30, 2011


I'm glad that C shows at least some tiny interest in potty training. However, walking through the reference department in the library is definitely NOT the time to sing "I pull down my pants, I did it by myself! I sit on the seat..."

I'm sure you also realize that C did not come with a low volume setting.

Thursday, December 29, 2011

You Talkin' Ta Me?

Me:  Take that finger out of your nose!
C (turns to look at me, finger still in nose):  Huh??
Me:  Take your finger out of your nose!
C:  Who?
Me:  You!
C:  Oooooh!  Okay.

A Healthy Diet

The rule of the day: if you don't know what it is, don't eat it.

(I suppose a lot of us would be healthier if we'd only ascribe to that!)

Apples and Engines

She wants to watch an apple-sode of Thomas the Tank Engine. Not an episode; I asked but she corrected me.

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Worry Over Nothing

I was a little worried about Toddler this morning. Tween woke up with a heavy cold today.  Toddler's been very clingy and huggy.

I also haven't been able to get her to eat anything, other than a few bites of toast - oh, and that mysterious crunchy thing she picked up from Tween's bedroom floor.

At 1:30 in the afternoon, I was feeling a little desperate about getting some food in her.  She's light to begin with, and I don't want her to enter an illness without some energy.  I offered her the usual favorites:  turkey, peanut butter on bread, or coffee yogurt.  She insisted she was not hungry (!!).  So I went for a treat:  chocolate pudding.

"No...uh...yeah!  I will eat chock-o-lit pudding."

I brought the pudding from the kitchen.  Suddenly an impish light was in her eyes.  "Pudding!  YAHOO!"

Then, just to really point out the error of my ways, she climbed onto one of her Little Tikes chairs and perched, swaying, with her feet on the seat and her heiny on the back.

This should be an interesting afternoon with a pudding-fueled imp running around my house.

Workin' On The Railroad

Misheard song lyrics Part 3:

I've been workin' on the railroad
All the livelong day
I've been workin' on the railroad
That's the password all the way

Needles and Pines

We've decided that squeezing behind the Christmas tree after refusing to put our clothes on scratches our bare back and hurts.

I hope you properly guess which part of "we" I'm speaking of.

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

NOT a defective product...

Just in case you were wondering, the Leapfrog Tag Reading System works fabulously on the Tag books, but won't say "booger" no matter how far up your nose you stick the tip of it.

Monday, December 26, 2011

Toddler Christmas

Christmas with a toddler was a really neat experience.  She saw the presents under the tree, but didn't really understand them.  She picked up one or two of them, but when asked to put them down, she immediately did.

When it was gift opening time, we gave her a present and helped her unwrap it.  She was SO thrilled to get each gift that the new item became her whole world.  She played and played, and didn't want to be interrupted with another box to unwrap.  By the end of our time, we were opening presents for her.

Saturday, December 24, 2011

Parts of Speech

My tween son and I are playing Mad Libs. C wants in on the action. 

"My turn! Blue!!!"
"My turn again! Potato!"

Drama Queen

I mentioned earlier today that we took the gate off of the stairs. C now ascends the stairs, then calls us to attention. "People!! I have something to tell you! PEOPLE!" Then, when we look, she says, "I have a song for you!" She launches into a loud, semi-accurate rendition of one of her favorite songs, complete with dancing. At the end, she applauds herself.

She was, unquestionably, made for theater.


Took the gate off the stairs yesterday. It's been a hair-raising time, but included only one minor tumble.

We have a split level, so it's a carpeted half-staircase, but I still feel like I'm sending her rappelling over the Grand Canyon or something!

Friday, December 23, 2011

No Sweet Tooth Here!

She definitely does not like my Cinnabon candy canes, which is a relief because I know our entire house would be a sticky mess if she enjoyed them.

Should she ever try one without the wrapper, though, she might change her mind.

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Tiger Talk

She has two small toy tigers.

C:  I have two tigers!  One, two!
Me:  Are they talking to each other?
C:  Yes!  They talking to 'chother.
Me:  What's this one's name?
C:  Tiger!
Me:  What's that one's name?
C:  Chother!

One day I fully expect to hear her follow this type of conversation with a nice, round "Duh, Momma!"


She's had a great day - no hitting, throwing, tantruming. An incredible turn-around from yesterday.

But she's getting frustrated.

She just marched up to me and stated, "I want to say 'hi-YAH!'"
Me: "Hi-YAH??"
C (Swinging her arm and jumping Ninja-style): "Hiiii-YAH!!!!!"

Spelling Bee

She is on another spelling kick today.

C: How you spell eye?
Me: E-Y-E
C: How you spell the nother eye?

Very, very hard to laugh and spell correctly at the same time!

Monday, December 19, 2011

New Phrases

C has picked up not one, but two, new favorite phrases this weekend:
"I don't HAVE to do that!"
"I don't care."

Thursday, December 15, 2011

More Serenading

Guess what she's singing now:

All day I be-de-be-de bum!

Classical Serenade

Toddler sings Handel:

Ha-yuyah! Ha-yuyuh! Hayuyah, hayuyah, ha-yuyah!

Rejoice! Rejoice! Rejo-o-o-o-oice quickly!

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Too Bad Clowns Don't Deliver

"Mommmmmaaaaa," C called, so I came in the living room to see what she wanted. She looked forlorn. 
Me: "Aw! What do you need, baby?"
C: "I need..."
Me: "Do you need a cup of milk?"
C: "Noooo. I need..."
Me: "Do you need a hug?"
C: "No. I need...I need..." (Suddenly jumping up and down) "I need chicken nuggets and french fries!"

Monday, December 12, 2011

Backyard Trouble Makers

She's climbed onto a chair at the dining room table with several of her Backyardigans toys.

"No, Uniqua!  Don't touch a THING!  Don't, Uniqua!!"


Anyone know how to wash coffee stains out of a pink stuffed animal?

Good? Bad?

I'm irredeshtable!

Now if I could only figure out what on earth she's saying...

From the Couldn't Possibly Make This Stuff Up file:

Today she's a panda cowboy riding to Borneo.

Sunday, December 11, 2011


She wants to see a tiger at the zoo. And a hippo. And a zebra. And a unicorn.

Good in the Eye of the Beholder

Just heard myself say this:

What a good girl you've been today! You've hardly thrown anything, and haven't kicked, or hit, or bitten anybody at all! You've had a really good day!

Wow. Reality hits hard!

The Presence of the Lord

Sitting through the worship service with a toddler who can sight read a few words but has no social skills is difficult.  As the words to the songs are projected onto the screen in the front, the toddler in the back is very proud of herself.
"Look!  The!  I found the word The!"
"Mommy!  And!  It say And!"
"With!  With, Mommy!"

But the best one, by far (and you know this kind of thing always happens during a lull), was this:
"Mommy!!  I SEE GOD!!"

Lofty ideas

I look up and see her on the dining room table.

Me:  Climb down from that table!
C (looking around innocently):  Oh, I dunno...
Me:  Do you want to sit in your play pen?
C (backing quickly to the edge of the table):  Oh!  You are right!  I go sit in the chair now!

Nuttin' For Christmas

Nuttin’ For Christmas
(Toddler Version)

I’m gettin’ nuttin’ for Christmas
Mommy and Daddy are mad
I’m gettin’ nuttin’ for Christmas
‘Cuz I ain’t been nuttin’ but bad

I wrote with marker on my clothes
Somebody snitched on me
I stuffed some Play Doh up my nose
Somebody snitched on me

I climbed the fridge in nothing flat
Poured oatmeal in Brother’s hat
Put my diaper on the cat
Somebody snitched on me


I decorated with my poo
Somebody snitched on me
I helped myself to Elmer’s glue
Somebody snitched on me

I hid Mom’s cell phone in a drawer
Shut Sister’s fingers in the door
Dumped my milk out on the floor
Somebody snitched on me


I won’t be seeing Santa Claus
Somebody snitched on me
He won’t come visit me because
Somebody snitched on me

There’s still a chance - I’m awfully cute
I’ll eat my veggies and my fruit
I’ll charm that guy in the big red suit
And get some gifts for me!


When I got ready for church, I carefully scrunched my hair, making sure it fell just right and had the right amount of curl.

After service, she climbed into my lap and took my hair in her hands.  With a disdainful look in her eye she asked, "Did you BRUSH this?"

Friday, December 9, 2011

Diaper Tales

A diaper story: proceed at your own risk.
She runs into the closet and closes the door. It's her usual doody spot lately.
Me: Are you pooping?
C: No!
<Loud noises ensue that I don't need to describe>
Me: Was that you pooping?
C: It was Larry the Cucumber!

Christmas Expectations

Apparently she is unaware of the fact that Santa gives coal sometimes. Either that or she just doesn't care.

I think she's counting on the cute factor to carry the day. I'm afraid, also, that she's right.

Monday, December 5, 2011

Primitive Eating Conditions

Forks must have been invented by some cavemom trying to get her kidlings to stop shoving every single piece of roast brontosaurus in their little Neanderthal mouths at once.

Now I have to figure out how she got them to NOT poke everyone and everything around them. The maniacal laughter really needs to stop, too.

Saturday, December 3, 2011

Definitely NOT!

Charis made up a new song to the tune of Frere Jacques. It goes like this:

No, no, no, no (repeat)
No, no, no! (repeat)
No, no, no, no, no, no (repeat)
No, no, no! (repeat)


She doesn't seem to appreciate it much when we sing it back to her, though.