Every Good Store Should Have One

We walked through Home Depot the other day. We were reading the department signs to each other: Lighting, Window Treatments, Lumber. Suddenly she gets excited. 

"Momma? Where is the Ducky Department?"

Suggestible

C: Momma, I'm hungry. I want something to eat! Then I'll go to bed.
Me: How about a yogurt?
C: Well...I'd really like some eggs.
Me: Sorry, but I'm not going to cook eggs right now.
C: Oh. Well, how about some French toast?
Me (laughing): No, no French toast tonight.
C: Oh! I know!
Me: What do you want?
C: How about soooooooome...YOGURT?!

Things I Never Thought I'd Say Part 5,426

"No, no! Take that chopstick out of your nose!"

Sand...or not

C plays with the sugar in the sugar bowl. I take her outside. She sits on the ground next to the sand box and talks about the toys but won't touch them. I bring her inside. She plays with the sugar in the sugar bowl.

I'm pretty sure this is psychological warfare.

Grammar Rocks!

Ah. This one is definitely MY child.

Me: Good night!
C: Momma?
Me: Yes?
C: I sleeping TIGHTLY!

Yep. Gotta love a nice, correct adverb when appropriate. Now it looks like we just need a little tweak with our helping verbs and we're good to grammarize.

Fun.

Her Irrational Regalness, upon being given free run of the house while I used the bathroom, instead decided to stand outside the door yelling, "No! I will NOT play!" until I came out.

That's the kind of day it is here.

A Long Time Coming

Wow! I put her to bed and...she went to sleep! Amazing!

Alternatives

At the lunch table:

J: C! Don't hit me!
Me: C, please don't hit J.
C: Oh. Okay.
Me: Don't hit him again.
C: Can I scratch him?

Shopping List

Me: We need to go to the grocery store.
C: Oooh! Buy junk food!
Me (puzzled): What?....Buy what?
C: Junk. Food. 
    Buy. 
    Junk. 
    Food.

Way Back When

Just plain bizarre to have your not-quite-three-year-old talking about things that happened "when I was a little girl."

*******

Some of it is from six to twelve months ago. Some is just plain invention. :)

She actually has a pretty good memory. After Christmas she was telling someone what she got for presents. Once she finished her list, she started naming all the things she'd gotten the year before - very accurately, too.

Sometimes she's just silly, too. :)

Bedtime Prayers

Heavenly Favver, thank you for ours foods, and help the Lord to sleep. Thank you for our grill. Thank you that my stomach doesn't frows, and thank you for it's feeling better. In Jesus' name, amen.

Oh! We gotta pray for the Wii! 

Heavenly Favver, thank you for that J could play on the Wii. Amen!

Ironic

Irony: The toddler dropping the container of disinfectant wipes into the toilet.

Ah!

Wow. She slept through the entire night! Can't remember the last time she did that.

Mischief

Today she drew LONG, swirly orange lines in the middle of the living room carpet. It's amazing how quickly she can ruin things as I chase her yelling, "No! No!" 

She also used my Kindle Fire to purchase Season 1 of Blue's Clues. Sure hope Amazon is understanding about that one...

Wacky Waking

She was up 5-6 times last night (or more...I can't count at 3 a.m.). She got up at 10 this morning, and is now asleep under the dining room table.

Why can't I sleep under the dining room table?

A Willing Worker

Thankful this morning that C constantly talks to herself. I heard her at 3 a.m. and got up to find her wandering through the house! I put her back to bed, but she got up before me. She had taken her cup and her teddy bear into the bathroom, where she was just preparing to scrub the sink. I have no idea who left the bucket of cleaning supplies out - yikes!

Guess I'd better put the gate back on her doorway!

From The Back Seat Of The Car

C: No!! Bad J! Not nice not nice not nice!!! Stop it, J!
Me: What's he doing?
C: He looking at the plane I looking at! Not nice!

Sometime later, after a trip through the Dunkin Donuts drive-thru:

C: No, no, no! You can't have it! Go away!
Me: What is it now?
C: He asking me for a bite of my chocolate doughnut! No, no, no! Bad J!
Me: He shares food with you all the time!
C: No bite for you, J. <pause> Momma?
Me: Yes?
C: You wanna bite of my chocolate doughnut?

A New Old Friend

Someone gave us a huge bag of M&Ms. C had a few too many. She danced, she climbed, she jumped. Finally she settled herself in front of the wall and had a lengthy, intense discussion with her shadow, complete with dramatic hand gestures. At the end, "they" high-fived.

I'm A Poor Listener

"Momma, I'm going to tell you a story. I will tell it to you, and you will listen. So listen.

One Sunday morning, on the sun there was a biiiiig problem. It was raining!"

Sorry...my laughter killed any chance of finding out what happened next.

An Interesting Day

Don't dance the salsa on your bed!
No somersaults at the top of the stairs!
Don't run around with your pants around your ankles!
The sides of your diaper are NOT wings!

What an interesting day.